An Open Letter to Mom

Dear Mom, It’s been so long since I’ve seen you and I miss you terribly. I miss the way we used to walk in the woods and pick violets. I miss the old washtub you let me play in and my Annie Oakley gun set and the way you used to hold me by the window so I could watch the snow. There’s so much that I want to tell you.

When I was fifty years old I discovered that I have multiple personality disorder. I know if you were here and could talk to the psychologists and psychiatrists you would understand me better. I acted crazy when I was growing up and you had no idea what to do with me. Thank goodness, now I understand it. I had several personalities doing things that were not socially acceptable and acting out against you and Father. Please forgive me.

I had a problem with rage, as I’m sure you remember. The rage was not against you, it was against the babysitter that abused me when I was four years old. Mom, she held a butcher knife over me and threatened to kill me if I told you or Father. If you think back to the summer of 1946, you’ll remember that I started acting strange. You kept asking me what was wrong, but I couldn’t tell you. I was hoping you’d figure it out, but you didn’t.  So I know you formed a great dislike for me because I failed in every way to be the daughter you wanted. Again, please forgive me. I know it may be a few more years before I see you again, and that day is in the Lord’s timing. Just know that I love you dearly and I’ll see you when I get to heaven. Love, Nancy


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Other Multiples

If you know someone with multiple personalities, please tell them about my blog. I would like to connect with them

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